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| PHOTO PROMPT © Dawn M. Miller |
Sitting in a train compartment that’s moving in a rhythmic motion
I find that the rumbling of the tracks talking to me. That clanking sound I hear starts beating out
words.
‘IknowyoudiditIknowyoudidit’
I dab at the sweat on my brow, furtively casting glances at
the other passengers.
‘youleftherdeadyouleftherdead’
My throat feels parched as I wonder if anyone else can hear
these words.
I catch that old lady sitting opposite me looking at me, our
eyes meet and she puts her head down.
‘sheknowsyoudiditsheknowsyoudidit’
We will be passing through a tunnel soon. My fingers caress the coiled wire in my
pocket.
***
Welcome all to another week of the Friday Fictioneers. To read what the other Fictioneers overheard this week click here. My title today is a nod to one of my favourite writers ;-)
I'd love read what you think about this post...
A nicely done concatenation of consequences
ReplyDeleteThanks Neil that is a neat way of putting it.
DeleteThe movie ‘murder on ORIENT Express’ is one pf my fav movies. Your post has captured the enigma if the film.
ReplyDeleteThanks Kalpana. That was a great movie.
DeleteGlad I wasn't in his carriage, having my thoughts read to the rhythm of the train. Well told.
ReplyDeleteIt's his conscience that seems to be mind reading. Thank you for commenting.
DeleteNot Poirot, could the old lady be Miss Marple instead?!
ReplyDeleteOoh! Great idea. That would totally turn things around.
DeleteOh no. Poor woman probably has no idea. Unless she has a coil of her own.
ReplyDeleteThanks Linda. I like where you are going with that idea.
Deletethe "inner voice" chant works a charm in this, which makes it refreshing for a very often considered plot .... adds a cool beat to the imaginings of a train's rhythm too .... so well done.
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading and commenting, I am glad you liked it.
DeleteDear Subroto,
ReplyDeleteThe inner voice is compelling and adds to the tension in this piece. I almost put my fingers in my ears to avoid hearing the ensuing blast. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks Rochelle, I tried to make that voice sound like the clickety-clackety noise of a train. I am glad it worked.
DeleteOh I think he will continue to pile bodies till he's caught
ReplyDeleteI think you may be right about that Björn.
DeleteSo long old lady. .See ya..
ReplyDeleteCuriosity killed the lady this time. Thanks for commenting Violet.
DeleteHe feels so guilty he sees things that probably aren't even there. Maybe that lady is just looking at him sweat, thinking he doesn't like train travel... And now, because he is so fidgety, she's going to die for it...
ReplyDeleteExcellent job, Subroto!
You have thought this out like a true detective :-)
DeleteThanks for your comments Dale , I am glad you liked it.